Tuesday, January 21, 2014

JANIE JUNEBUG'S TEASE: MY ONE THOUSANDTH POST CELEBRATION

Considering that I have now written 1,045 posts, I think it's time to make an effort to wrap up my ONE THOUSANDTH POST CELEBRATION. Weighing in at #3 on the top of the pops chart, here's JANIE JUNEBUG'S TEASE GRAND OPENING.  Originally published on March 3, 2013, this post has been viewed 1,886 times. 

However, I feel compelled to point out that in spite of the many page views, I have never earned enough to receive one single check from Cafe Press. Thanks to you lazy louts    cheap bastards kind people, I haven't met the minimum amount in profits that would grant me a check for $25. Pffffffffft.

Gentle Readers . . . and Maxwell,

I'm so excited! I've designed a line of t-shirts, and they're available in my online shop, Janie Junebug's Tease, at CafePress.com.

I had the idea for these shirts years and years ago but didn't know how to get them made and sell them until the famous author and publisher EC Stilson, a.k.a. my middle child Elisa at The Crazy Life Of A Writing Mom, said, Hey my mother from another planet, you can go to CafePress.com and design your t-shirts and they'll sell them for you.

I looked into it, and of course my brilliant middle child knew of what she spake. That's why she's a famous author and publisher who's on Wikipedia (can you tell I'm proud of my girl?). (Note: Sadly, Wayman Publishing was forced to go out of business recently.) CafePress doesn't charge me anything. I get a royalty for anything in my shop that sells.

For now, I'm sticking to white t-shirts with black lettering. But if you want me to add canvas bags or coffee mugs or bumper stickers, you just let me know and I can do it.

I have men's, women's, women's plus sizes, and junior's t-shirts. They come with short sleeves, long sleeves, or without sleeves. I hope you'll think they're cute.

Here's what I have available:

CATHOLICS DO IT WITH A VIRGIN

LUTHERANS DO IT WITH GRACE

SEVENTH DAY ADVENTISTS DO IT ON SATURDAY

BAPTISTS DO IT UNDERWATER

PENTECOSTALS DO IT WITH TONGUES

UNITARIANS DO IT WITH ANYBODY

ATHEISTS DO IT ALONE

AGNOSTICS DON'T KNOW IF THEY DO IT

JEHOVAH'S WITNESSES DO IT ALL OVER YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD

MORMONS DO IT IN MAGIC UNDERWEAR

If you have an idea for a shirt you'd like me to add, then please let me know. No copyright infringement, of course, and no profanity and nothing pornographic (that leaves out your ideas, Coffey).

The link to my shop is at the top of the sidebar on this page. It's www.cafepress.com/JanieJunebugsTease. I'll love you if you check out my shop and give me some feedback. I'll love you even more if you buy a shirt and/or if you spread the word on your blogs and on Facebook and Twitter. (I owe $2500 in taxes and I still can't find a job.)

But, you know what? If you don't do a darn thing, I'll still love you. I can't help it.


Infinities of love,

Janie Junebug





Update: I have added Editor's Tips Tease and Military Tease, and I'm not sure I love you as much as I did when I wrote this post.

33 comments:

  1. Some cool logos on the shirts. I visited your shop. You have it set up pretty nice. If I were 20 years younger I would buy one. I think these will go over well with the younger crowd.

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    1. Thank you, Beth! Being a Lutheran, I think I might get "LUTHERANS DO IT WITH GRACE." Because we do.

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  2. Fun logos. I doubt you have them big enough for a chubby chatterbox but I wish you much success in launching this new venture.

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    1. Maybe not large enough for Mr. C, but how about Mrs. C? I think she deserves a gift.

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  3. I think, "Jehovah Witnesses Do It Door To Door" is good, too. How about "Muslim's Do It To Death"?

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    1. I like J.H. do it door to door, but I don't want to get involved with Muslims.

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  4. Thanks for the AWESOME mention! I'm so excited about these shirts. :)

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    1. Thanks, Middle Child, and thank you for supporting my idea and my post.

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  5. Hahaha! Those are hilarious! I'm not anything in particular though and if I try and associate with the more Protestant side in Cork, I have a good chance of being beaten in the streets!

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    1. I don't ever want my Princess Maggie to get hurt -- especially because of a shirt!

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  6. Replies
    1. I was thinking about SCIENTOLOGISTS DO IT WITH CELEBRITIES. Do you like that?

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  7. I love it!! Tony's brother's girlfriend owns an embroidery shop... she's doing my shirts for the walk for free... "Walking my can off for a cure" a nod to the fact that we are collecting returnable soda cans to raise money for the walk. :)

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    1. That's a great slogan, Juli. I hope your fundraising is going well.

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  8. Oh, aren't you clever?! These are great. You still need to come up for one for Jews, Methodists and Presbyterians. I hope you sell a bazillion of them!

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    1. I don't have any ideas for those three. Suggestions, anyone?

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  9. Love your shirts!! How about "Jews do it on Friday nights" or "Jews do it over a bowl of chicken soup"?

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    1. Those are great. Thank you. I didn't have any ideas for Jews. I hope to add a few things to the shop over the weekend. I've had some other suggestions, too.

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  10. Dear Janie, I'm not the least bit witty and so T-shirt slogans don't come easily for me. But how about "Bakers do it in the oven"????? Peace.

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  11. Good luck with your new endeavor!

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  12. Lol. These are so witty. Will visit your shop.
    www.thoughtsofpaps.com

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  13. I'm sorry to hear Wayman's Press is out of business. I was actually wondering about the Random Acts of Kindness Anthology. That's too bad!

    Café Press has been a bust for me, too. Can't hurt to keep promoting it, though.

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    1. It had to happen. Middle Child is so busy.

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  14. LOL! Too creative for me. My brain is mush after sleeping 1.5 hours, but hey, these things happen, right? (Meaning insomnia and the following insanity.)

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  15. You don't have "Narcissus do it with themselves" sorry but for some strange reason that popped into my head the spelling might be wrong though.

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    1. That's cute, Jo-Anne. It would be "narcissists".

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  16. Do you have anything for a lapsed Catholic??

    -andi

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